What About Doubt?
What About Doubt?
John 20:19–31
April 12, 2026 First Sunday after Easter
Rev Jeffrey Cochran-Carney, First Presbyterian Church, San Rafael, CA
When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you." After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, "Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you." When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained."
But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, "We have seen the Lord." But he said to them, "Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe." A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you."
Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe." Thomas answered him, "My Lord and my God!"
Jesus said to him, "Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe." Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name.
Good morning! It’s nice to be with you this morning. You may have heard that the Sunday after Easter is often referred to as “Low Sunday.” You can probably guess why. I asked Cynthia if it was called “Low Sunday” because I was preaching! And the answer is? I told her not to put it in the e-news! People might stay home! See? It worked!
But all kidding aside, I have really enjoyed preaching on Thomas over the years. I think he is really important. The story of Thomas is where the rubber meets the Easter road once the big day is over. I also discovered some things that I have never preached before in terms of Thomas. You will hear more about that later.
The setting for today’s scripture reading begins on that first Easter evening and then shifts to a week after Easter. After the public execution of Jesus, his closest friends and followers did the prudent thing: they went into hiding. Someone found a safe house in Jerusalem, a room big enough for all of them, one with a stout door and a strong bolt.
They had been there, hiding in that room, since Friday afternoon. There they were, lying low, trying just to blend in, waiting for the furor surrounding the arrest, trial, and crucifixion of Jesus to settle, afraid that if they were seen publicly, they would be identified as his friends, arrested and crucified themselves.
Earlier that day, before dawn, a few of the women had ventured out while it was still dark.
They had gone to the tomb to anoint the body of Jesus with spices and ointments and returned breathless, almost hysterical, babbling something about the tomb being open, and his body being gone, and it was all accompanied by angels and earthquakes. More incredibly, Mary claimed to have seen Jesus and talked to him. But the ones in the room dismissed it as an “idle tale.”
And then, that evening something happened that none of them would ever forget, something that made all the difference in the world, something that challenged everything they thought they knew about life and death. Suddenly he was there, Jesus.
Was it an apparition? Did they imagine it? Jesus came, and stood among them. And what he said was, “Peace be with you.” He said it a second time so they wouldn’t miss the point: “Peace be with you.” And then he told them why he was there, why they were given this Easter experience: “As the Father has sent me, so I send you.”
As the wonderful preacher John Buchannan put it, “The point here is to get everyone out of that room -- to give them enough peace, enough of his spirit—his life and breath—to get them up and moving again.” I had the great privilege of hearing John preach at Fourth Presbyterian Church in Chicago when I was a young seminarian at McCormick. Some of my thoughts here about Thomas were inspired by him.
You see, the death of Jesus had the disciples stopped in their tracks. They had forgotten what he said about the resurrection. He wanted them to get up and move toward the door, toward the streets of the city, toward their homes and families and communities. He wanted them to get moving towards life itself – life now, and life eternal.
Life could now be dramatically and profoundly different because Jesus has come to them and breathed on them and sent them out. But first, one of the company is missing. He’s actually one of my favorites, Thomas.
Frederick Buechner thinks Thomas just wanted some fresh air, wanted to get away from the heavy oppression of that locked room, that prison, so he’s having a cup of coffee or sitting on a park bench feeding pigeons.
He’s not there when Jesus appears and breathes on the disciples and sends them out. When he returns, he says – “Unless I see it too—see the evidence, see the nail holes in his hands—I’m not believing it. No way.” The late Raymond Brown, a wonderful New Testament scholar, observed that the Greek is extraordinarily emphatic here, something like, “I’ll never believe it; do you think I’m crazy?”
I think Thomas is actually the patron saint of rational, skeptical, postmodern people like you and me. That may make faith more difficult. I think Thomas simply says what you and I would have said in that situation: “Show me. Show me your hands and side.” Thomas gets the name Doubting Thomas because we think that doubt is the opposite of faith, that having a religious faith means not having any doubts.
Thomas is an important reminder that doubt is a normal, natural part of faith. But what if we don’t know every last detail? What if we don’t have intellectual certainty? Maybe it’s a matter of trusting God with what you don’t know. Who better to have on your side then God, when you don’t know, when you don’t have all the answers? Something as large and extraordinary as the resurrection and eternal life can never be known with intellectual certainty.
I still remember what my philosophy professor said nearly fifty years ago. He quoted the French philosopher and mathematician Blaise Pascal. Pascal said, “The heart has it’s own reasons which reason alone cannot comprehend.” That’s why it’s important to be quiet, and listen to that still, small voice within, and yet, for many people in this loud, busy, frantic world, that’s the last place they would think to look for God - is deep inside.
I love what the poet Rainer Maria Rilke wrote about doubt and uncertainty: He says, “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and learn to love the questions themselves.” Maybe the better part of spiritual maturity is being able to hold doubt and faith in creative tension with one another. Learn to live with the ambiguity of faith and doubt, and even to welcome and embrace it.
Our friend Anne Lamott who lives not far from here says, “The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns.”
But getting back to Thomas for a moment, I like to say that Thomas got a second chance just a week after Easter. What would you do with a second chance? A second chance at life, a second chance at love, another chance at happiness and purpose, a second chance at making better decisions? A second chance of letting go of regret or bitterness?
A second chance of being all that God created you to be? That’s a big part of the gift of Easter for Thomas and for us – the death of regret and disappointment, and the rebirth of hope.
When Thomas returned a week after Easter and had an encounter with the risen Jesus,
he received the greatest gift of all -- the gift of a second chance, and so can we. In fact, Easter means you have already been given an opportunity for a new beginning. I also like to think of it as grace. Unmerited. Unsought, but abundant and freely given. Just ask. Just claim what is already there within you when you have a few moments of quiet to look deep inside. Take a look. See what you find.
When it comes to asking and receiving, I like what Paulo Coelho said in his novel, The Alchemist. He said, “The universe conspires to make your dreams come true.” “The universe conspires to make your dreams come true.” Just take a moment and let that sink in. Cynthia and I would never have ended up in California, and we wouldn’t be standing before you here today if I didn’t believe that with all my heart. Thomas certainly found his heart’s desire and a new direction more than he imagined. His encounter with Jesus was transforming.
When I was working on this sermon, a tune and some words came to me, and I decided to follow it through, and see where it might lead. It turned out to be more or less a musical version of the gospel story you heard this morning about Thomas. Take a listen.
Song: Thomas by Jeffrey Cochran-Carney
Over the hillside and into the woods, Thomas sat silent, doing well as he could.
His Lord was risen, for others to see, But Thomas was missing, he would not believe.
Thomas, Thomas, do you know more than me? Can you tell me what you see?
Touch his hand, understand, all the things that he told you.
Thomas, Thomas, if only you believe, There’s no telling what you’ll be,
Where you go, they will know, it will show, he is living in you.
Over the hillside and into the land, Thomas felt different, he was a new man.
Sometimes you’re lucky, to be where you should, When the Lord is risen, as he said he would.
Thomas, Thomas, do you know more than me? Can you tell me what you see?
Touch his hand, understand, all the things that he told you.
Thomas, Thomas, if only you believe, There’s no telling what you’ll be,
Where you go, they will know, it will show, he is living in you.
Where you go, they will know, it will show, he is living in you. Thomas . . . Thomas . .
Indeed, Thomas was a new man. This is what we think happened with Thomas after his encounter with the risen Jesus: We are fortunate to have quite a bit of research from numerous scholars and historians about what happened to Thomas after that first Easter and his encounter with the risen Lord. I have preached on Thomas for thirty-seven years, and I had never come across some of these ideas before.
What I discovered was that Thomas is believed to have traveled all the way to India to spread Christianity. The document entitled, The Acts of Thomas, written in the 3rd century, is an apocryphal text detailing Thomas's missionary journeys and miraculous deeds in India.
An apocryphal book means it is not officially recognized as a book of the bible, but still holds spiritual significance and importance among scholars and historians, including prominent figures such as Origen and Eusebius in their historical writings that attest to this. Some sources also attribute the Gospel of Thomas to him as well. It is a collection of sayings about Jesus. It was an oral tradition passed down by his students and followers.
Thomas is credited with establishing several Christian communities in India. Tradition holds that Thomas was martyred in India, often depicted as being killed by a spear. His legacy is significant to Christians in India still today, particularly among the Saint Thomas Christians.
In India, St Thomas is revered as the apostle who travelled the furthest, a tradition that has deep roots in South Indian history and culture today. He is also venerated by Eastern Orthodox Christians. That’s pretty darn good for a man who was once filled with doubt and fear and remorse.
Do you know the acronym FOMO? Fear Of Missing Out? We can look back and see that applied to Thomas in spades. But no longer. Life can be different for us as well. It’s the Easter difference. If God can do that much with Thomas, who harbored doubts and skepticism, what do you suppose God can do with you and me? Let’s not wait any longer to find out. Amen
Resource
Rev. Dr. John Buchanan, “Sent,” April 15 , 2007 Fourth Presbyterian Church, Chicago, IL https://fourthchurch.org/sermons/2007/041507.html